I participate in a Favorite Things Swap hosted by the blog hostess with the mostest, according to kelly. And while I'm a little late, I wanted to put out the welcome mat again to all of the Swap participants who might stumble upon this space.
I am a married, stay-at-home mama of two kiddos. The boy is five, the girl is 3. The husband, the love of my life, and I have been married 7 years this August. Yay, us!
I blog because I can. Because it's less expensive than therapy. Because I, like every other mortal being, want to leave some sort of mark (or blemish) on this round glorious rock that declares "I WAS HERE, DARN IT!"
My spelling is off at times, my views/posts tend to be a little skewed to my politics. And I swear. Like a sailor. But I don't smoke. I don't drink in excess (notice I qualified the drinking by "excess"...I do loves me some "olive soup"). I don't do drugs nor do I engage in any other adrenaline high provoking activity. Swearing is my high. My elixir. The "F-word" my ultimate nirvana. While swearing is never becoming of a lady, it is the closest I can get to expressing rage without damaging property. And I never mean to offend. Ever.
On this space you'll find a variety of posts on a variety of subjects, ranging from the madness & the reflective side of motherhood, personal growth, saying goodbye to family & goodbye to good friends, politics, and "business". Currently, I'm following the Arizona Legislature and how their actions (or inaction) are affecting public education. I'm an unapologetic supporter and advocate for public education. It can likely be said I'm an unapologetic supporter of many things. I am someone who loves to engage in debate and hear opposing views, but I will likely never ever let go of the hope that we can reach a place of mutuality, understanding, compassion and acceptance. This blog resembles that struggle to find that space of "ahhh..."; in my community, in my home, and within myself.
When I'm not terribly consumed with political nonsense and poopy panties, I venture around the Intertubes, visiting the doorsteps of various people who I've come to admire for their writing and/or their passionate views. My faves are on the sidebar over there. And of course, according to kelly is a long time darling on my list of daily stops for domestic zen. She inspires me to get my craft on, as well as encourages me to channel my own domestic diva. Three kids, a craft GODDESS, and fabulous hostess for this annual swap. How lucky are we, gang? Oh, the luckiest.
There you have it. Me. I'm ever so thankful you have stopped by. You're always welcome here.
Happy Favorite Things Swap, kids!
Monday, July 6, 2009
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Bitchy Post Warning: Long nights keeping watch on the AZ Legislature...
Last night wasn't any different than the long string of nights at my house. It was after 2 AM before I crawled into bed this morning. My ears were still ringing and a bit hurty from hours of live legislative "whah-whawhah-AAAHHH" streaming through iPod ear buds dug deep into my ears for hours on end. My eyes burned. And my brain raged--the kind of rage where I felt possessed by the spirit of a Scotsman who readies to head butt his opponent, as reason is completely lost on the insipid idiot he's ready to pummel.
I'm really tired--like SOUL-raging-tired--of listening to my legislature bleed rivers for businesses and corporations, crafting legislation to save/create business/industry in the name of all those folks they'll hopefully retain/employ. All the while they are throwing families, low-income families, senior citizens under the bus.
The legislature has pushed forward sweeping tax reform that did little more than shift the tax burden off of utility/mine companies and onto the broken back's of homeowners. How do you platform, campaign and SIGN a "No Tax Pledge" on the basis of being a fiscal conservative when you aren't CUTTING taxes, but SHIFTING them? And where you shift them is ONTO an already cash-strapped sector in our state!
Ah, and then there's the flat income tax. :::sigh::: Kids, this one fires up my justice meter so that it's highly probable I'll have a heart attack. A flat tax will affect 40% of Arizona's seniors--men and women already living on FIXED incomes--who will see their taxes INCREASE. And over 50% of Arizona's middle-income families are going to see their taxes INCREASE.
I heard it mentioned in the Senate Education Committee (we'll talk about the absurdity of the Senate Ed Committee hearing budget bills later), the impact of a flat income tax could mean between a $450 million to $1.4 billion per year NEGATIVE impact on revenue. While many in the state suggest we simply have a spending problem, I'd respectfully disagree. What we have is a revenue AND a spending problem. Cutting spending and significantly restricting access to revenue, which admittedly funds the programs so many under served citizens need, is not going to balance the budget indefinitely. Demand for these programs will increase, as more and more families find it impossible to keep up with their basic living expenses.
Middle and low income families will not benefit from a flat tax. A flat tax would benefit a specific/select group at the expense of a majority of Arizonans. It's a great solution if you're wealthy, as it levels out and/or LOWERS your income tax liability. BUT...IF you AREN'T, it will likely RAISE your income taxes.
This isn't about going after/attacking wealthy people who have worked hard to reach a fiscal state of comfort and security. This is, however, about our CITIZEN legislature passing sweeping tax legislation that further secures a specific sector's prosperity on the backs and at the expense of a majority of average-income Arizonans.
Play along with me a moment, kids. Let's say you're wealthy in the state of AZ and you own a business. Thanks to the AZ Legislature, YOUR taxes are about to go down. I, your customer, will see my residential taxes go up, as your tax liability (or lack thereof) impacts my school district's bond rating and/or the over-ride I voted for fails.
As your customer, I pay for your goods/services and you earn an INCOME, which will be taxed at a LOWER rate, thanks to the flat tax. The flat tax rate, however RAISES the taxes on my average income, which translates into less take-home pay for my family.
Question: Just how long do you think you're going to be in business?
On the upside, Governor Brewer is calling all legislators back to the Capitol July 6th. MAYBE this whole post will be for nothing. Just some random rant on something that never went anywhere.
The list of things I am left to hope for is looking mighty pathetic these days.
I'm really tired--like SOUL-raging-tired--of listening to my legislature bleed rivers for businesses and corporations, crafting legislation to save/create business/industry in the name of all those folks they'll hopefully retain/employ. All the while they are throwing families, low-income families, senior citizens under the bus.
The legislature has pushed forward sweeping tax reform that did little more than shift the tax burden off of utility/mine companies and onto the broken back's of homeowners. How do you platform, campaign and SIGN a "No Tax Pledge" on the basis of being a fiscal conservative when you aren't CUTTING taxes, but SHIFTING them? And where you shift them is ONTO an already cash-strapped sector in our state!
Ah, and then there's the flat income tax. :::sigh::: Kids, this one fires up my justice meter so that it's highly probable I'll have a heart attack. A flat tax will affect 40% of Arizona's seniors--men and women already living on FIXED incomes--who will see their taxes INCREASE. And over 50% of Arizona's middle-income families are going to see their taxes INCREASE.
I heard it mentioned in the Senate Education Committee (we'll talk about the absurdity of the Senate Ed Committee hearing budget bills later), the impact of a flat income tax could mean between a $450 million to $1.4 billion per year NEGATIVE impact on revenue. While many in the state suggest we simply have a spending problem, I'd respectfully disagree. What we have is a revenue AND a spending problem. Cutting spending and significantly restricting access to revenue, which admittedly funds the programs so many under served citizens need, is not going to balance the budget indefinitely. Demand for these programs will increase, as more and more families find it impossible to keep up with their basic living expenses.
Middle and low income families will not benefit from a flat tax. A flat tax would benefit a specific/select group at the expense of a majority of Arizonans. It's a great solution if you're wealthy, as it levels out and/or LOWERS your income tax liability. BUT...IF you AREN'T, it will likely RAISE your income taxes.
This isn't about going after/attacking wealthy people who have worked hard to reach a fiscal state of comfort and security. This is, however, about our CITIZEN legislature passing sweeping tax legislation that further secures a specific sector's prosperity on the backs and at the expense of a majority of average-income Arizonans.
Play along with me a moment, kids. Let's say you're wealthy in the state of AZ and you own a business. Thanks to the AZ Legislature, YOUR taxes are about to go down. I, your customer, will see my residential taxes go up, as your tax liability (or lack thereof) impacts my school district's bond rating and/or the over-ride I voted for fails.
As your customer, I pay for your goods/services and you earn an INCOME, which will be taxed at a LOWER rate, thanks to the flat tax. The flat tax rate, however RAISES the taxes on my average income, which translates into less take-home pay for my family.
Question: Just how long do you think you're going to be in business?
On the upside, Governor Brewer is calling all legislators back to the Capitol July 6th. MAYBE this whole post will be for nothing. Just some random rant on something that never went anywhere.
The list of things I am left to hope for is looking mighty pathetic these days.
Pray for Arizona, people...
I've been off line for a while, kids. I haven't been totally MIA. But I've not been around these parts. I've been consumed with the rodeo known as the Arizona Legislature. It's been crazy town, man. I've been taking notes and I'm working on a snarky summary -- yes, snarky...snarky as all hell. I've minded my manners long enough, homeslice. I'm pissed. And I'm afraid. In the words of one of my FAVE Jersey Housewives: Our legislature is "crazy times ten."
Exhibit 531:
Pray for my state, people...
Exhibit 531:
Pray for my state, people...
Thursday, June 25, 2009
in a perfect world...
...we wouldn't have to watch as our friends' husbands lose their jobs.
...we wouldn't have to watch as our friends' husbands take jobs out of state.
...we wouldn't have to hold our breath as the day of departure neared.
...we wouldn't have to plan "goodbye" parties.
...we wouldn't need to arrange a final happy hour.
...we wouldn't need to hold out for the final hour before the final arrival at the door.
...we wouldn't make stupid conversation about landscaping rocks so we the tears we're fighting back will hold a moment longer.
...we wouldn't cry at goodbye, the rolling out of the drive way, or hours after until our noses are junked up, and our eyes are swollen and hot.
...we wouldn't have to say goodbye...because all of our doorsteps would be forever connected - one to the other - and geography would be irrelevant.
i'll miss you, Miss Jamie. my door, like my heart, is always open to you, fren. love you, girl.
...we wouldn't have to watch as our friends' husbands take jobs out of state.
...we wouldn't have to hold our breath as the day of departure neared.
...we wouldn't have to plan "goodbye" parties.
...we wouldn't need to arrange a final happy hour.
...we wouldn't need to hold out for the final hour before the final arrival at the door.
...we wouldn't make stupid conversation about landscaping rocks so we the tears we're fighting back will hold a moment longer.
...we wouldn't cry at goodbye, the rolling out of the drive way, or hours after until our noses are junked up, and our eyes are swollen and hot.
...we wouldn't have to say goodbye...because all of our doorsteps would be forever connected - one to the other - and geography would be irrelevant.
i'll miss you, Miss Jamie. my door, like my heart, is always open to you, fren. love you, girl.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
My Dad
From time to time, I am known to declare that I am unapologetically a "Daddy's Girl" - always have been, always will be. Maybe it's part of the "daddy-daughter" dynamic - the otherness that exists between a father and his daughter; and conversely, between a mother and her son. Or maybe it's not as much nature as it is nurture; the relationship that blooms past the protective bond between a father and a daughter - the shield from all things male, rock-and-roll, make up, and miniskirts - fed by the mutual quest for respect and understanding.
Most of the nurturing relationship my dad and I share has come after many years, and some dark moments made far easier by many bright beginnings. When I was growing up, his nature was to be "the provider." The one who got up, went to work, came home, made dinner, sent my brother and I off to finish homework and then off to bed. He had a routine. We had structure. It was like clockwork. Predictable. I can still recite the Sunday morning grocery list. He was a father of his father's making, and yet he found a way to make his role his own.
He wasn't a Judy Bloom kind of dad; no heartfelt discussions about boys and rainbows. Though he did have to give his own daddy-daughter version of "He's just not that into you." Mind you, he HATED those conversations and could only endure them one time, per boy. Per semester. Any more than that, "Oprah's on at 3."
I disappointed my dad growing up, and in one too many ways in my young adult life. One day I'll write a book about the heartache I left at his feet. That is, if he doesn't beat me to it first. ;) The strain each of those disappointments placed in our relationship was always far more punishing than any prescribed method of discipline. Hated it.
In those spaces of disappointment, we both learned to find our voice - his as a father, mine as a daughter - that wasn't about broken rules or adolescent rage. It was a long conversation had over the years that was about mutuality. Partnership. A relationship, as father and daughter beyond rules and code of conduct.
We began to find a way to carry the ball in our relationship as a team. The ease with which trust and respect was traded between us depended upon our ability to work and communicate as a team. I don't think either of us read that in a book. It just happened. Organically. We learned to nurture our relationship naturally.
Today, he's one of my best and dearest friends. The first person I want to call with good news, and the shoulder I still seek out when I'm not feeling terribly solid. He still is my hero. And a wonderful granddad to my kids, who adore him. They see their visits with him as being in the same league as a trip to Disneyland.
Fatherhood is complicated. Made harder, maybe, by the recent societal push to feminize the role fathers have in the lives of their children; encouraging them to talk about their feelings, explore their emotions. Some men do it quite well. Good for them.
But equally deserving of kudos are the silent ones who put their heads down and get through the day, everyday, with very little showmanship or emoting. Instead, their focus is on setting a bearing towards parenting responsibly; offering stability, consistency and routine. Not void of love, but driven by love. A force of nature.
Every father finds that one day, the kids are grown and out of the nests. How they fly after they leave the nest isn't always the father's responsibility. Sometimes, it's their glory. A child's struggle to find their own bearing outside of protected guard can be the search for finding a way to make for themselves that which they were blessed to have.
No one is perfect. No father. No daughter. But I still live to make you proud, Dad. Not because I have to. And not because you expect it. But because I thank you. And I am today, as I am everyday, ever so proud of you.
Happy Father's Day. I love ya.
Most of the nurturing relationship my dad and I share has come after many years, and some dark moments made far easier by many bright beginnings. When I was growing up, his nature was to be "the provider." The one who got up, went to work, came home, made dinner, sent my brother and I off to finish homework and then off to bed. He had a routine. We had structure. It was like clockwork. Predictable. I can still recite the Sunday morning grocery list. He was a father of his father's making, and yet he found a way to make his role his own.
He wasn't a Judy Bloom kind of dad; no heartfelt discussions about boys and rainbows. Though he did have to give his own daddy-daughter version of "He's just not that into you." Mind you, he HATED those conversations and could only endure them one time, per boy. Per semester. Any more than that, "Oprah's on at 3."
I disappointed my dad growing up, and in one too many ways in my young adult life. One day I'll write a book about the heartache I left at his feet. That is, if he doesn't beat me to it first. ;) The strain each of those disappointments placed in our relationship was always far more punishing than any prescribed method of discipline. Hated it.
In those spaces of disappointment, we both learned to find our voice - his as a father, mine as a daughter - that wasn't about broken rules or adolescent rage. It was a long conversation had over the years that was about mutuality. Partnership. A relationship, as father and daughter beyond rules and code of conduct.
We began to find a way to carry the ball in our relationship as a team. The ease with which trust and respect was traded between us depended upon our ability to work and communicate as a team. I don't think either of us read that in a book. It just happened. Organically. We learned to nurture our relationship naturally.
Today, he's one of my best and dearest friends. The first person I want to call with good news, and the shoulder I still seek out when I'm not feeling terribly solid. He still is my hero. And a wonderful granddad to my kids, who adore him. They see their visits with him as being in the same league as a trip to Disneyland.
Fatherhood is complicated. Made harder, maybe, by the recent societal push to feminize the role fathers have in the lives of their children; encouraging them to talk about their feelings, explore their emotions. Some men do it quite well. Good for them.
But equally deserving of kudos are the silent ones who put their heads down and get through the day, everyday, with very little showmanship or emoting. Instead, their focus is on setting a bearing towards parenting responsibly; offering stability, consistency and routine. Not void of love, but driven by love. A force of nature.
Every father finds that one day, the kids are grown and out of the nests. How they fly after they leave the nest isn't always the father's responsibility. Sometimes, it's their glory. A child's struggle to find their own bearing outside of protected guard can be the search for finding a way to make for themselves that which they were blessed to have.
No one is perfect. No father. No daughter. But I still live to make you proud, Dad. Not because I have to. And not because you expect it. But because I thank you. And I am today, as I am everyday, ever so proud of you.
Happy Father's Day. I love ya.
"I wonder if God is shaken"
One of the most profound lines in this video: "I wonder if God is shaken." It's hard to imagine how haunting the sound of hundreds of thousands of Iranians shouting "Allah-o Akbar" into the pitch black night is as it rolls into open windows, and dances in on a wind swept curtain. From this time zone, the sound cause me to think of rows of cells with imprisoned innocents standing at bars, faces pressed against impossible spaces, protesting their captivity. Their voice their freedom's only opportunity. Pray for these people. Pray for those brave enough to continue their protests at dawn. Pray for their peace. Pray that God may be shaken.
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